Blaming yourself for your problems
Bad things happen to everyone. Things don’t go the way we expect or desire. This is a common part of life. However, our interpretations of these events, how we frame them in our minds, has huge influence over how those things affect and change us.Firstly, there is a huge difference between taking responsibility for your life, and the decisions you’ve made, and blaming yourself for everything that goes wrong. If it rains or you get a flat tire, do you say “Oh, bad things always happen to me”? or “I have the worst luck ever”?. Unless you control the weather, or deliberately put a nail in your tire, this is not productive. It’s blaming yourself for something that simply isn’t your fault.
As soon as you stop blaming yourself or “your lousy luck” for the things that “go wrong” in your life, the sooner you will be freed up to a) take positive action, and b) resolve whatever the problem actually is.
An important note here, just because things are not your fault does not mean that you are not responsible for everything that happens in your life. If you get a flat because you’ve put off replacing a dangerous worn out tire, well yes, that is your fault. Similarly, blaming someone else (your boss, your wife, your parents) for your problems is as bad as blaming yourself. It may not be as destructive to yourself, but it definitely be destructive to your relationship with that person.
Taking consistent, positive action in your own life is the best way to ensure “good luck”. This tapping will help you keep that mental and emotional balance so you can do this.
[while continually tapping the karate chop point, say the following phrases, and as you do, pay attention and pick out the one that has the biggest effect on yourself]
bad stuff that happens to me is always my fault
I make the bad things happen to me
it’s all my fault
bad things happen to me because they’re my fault
[now loop through an entire loop (from eyebrow right through to crown) using the phrase you picked out, and saying:]
even though I believe that [negative statement] I deeply and completely love and forgive (or accept) myself
[finally, loop through as many times as you like, saying the following. If any of the phrases resonate with you, feel free to say it over and over as many times as you like. Continue until you feel relief & calm]
good things that happen are my fault
I don’t make -that- many mistakes
most bad things that happen are because of things outside my control
if it’s not something I did, then it’s not my fault
if it’s something outside me, then I shouldn’t beat myself up about it
things outside me happen all the time, I can just let them go
good things happen in my life because I draw them to me
great things happen to me because I do a great job
when bad things happen, it’s just an off day